heavenlydecree | the moon is rising on this dangerous night //

the moon is rising on this dangerous night //

[Takatora had, as usual, buried himself in work all day. He'd even stayed out far later than usual due to a few back-to-back business meetings, though he'd been kind enough to spare a few moments to let Mitsuzane know. He didn't want his younger brother to worry about where he was or why he wasn't home on time. Unfortunately, he was a bit vague with saying "probably around midnight". It had been one of those nights, meetings followed by outings and social drinking. Takatora had honestly never cared for it, but it was something he did because it made business partners happy. People talked a lot more when they had alcohol in their system as well, but Takatora had been careful to be polite in his acceptance of drinks while still going slow enough to maintain his composure. There was always the sinking concern that someone would manipulate information out of him while he was vulnerable. He couldn't allow that to happen.

By the time he returns home, it's closer to twelve-thirty. His clothing and everything about him smells of smoke and alcohol. It makes him a bit self-conscious, knowing it's completely out of character for him. He'd even, on one of his rare instances, accepted a cigarette from a colleague. It was a strange and nostalgic happening, but Takatora had thoroughly washed his mouth out afterwards. Still, the smell of smoke from that and the bar itself clung to him.

Takatora rubs at the back of his neck as he walks through the home, anxious to change out of his clothes. However, in passing Mitsuzane's door, he hesitates and then doubles back. It would be best to check on him in case he'd waited up. So he knocks, careful and light.]

Mitsuzane?

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I wouldn't have minded.

[Okay, maybe waking up with his brother in his bed after the night they'd had and with Takatora's lack of clothing would have been awkward, but he would have accepted it. Takatora sits up a bit more when he notices Mitsuzane's face, bringing one hand up to brush any remnants of tears away with his thumb. It really does break his heart to see his brother like this.

As soon as Mitsuzane reaches for his shoulder, Takatora makes a soft noise and flinches away instinctively. That... well, now he knew, didn't he? At least that it existed. On top of that, the pale purple of a bruise was on his cheek -- along his his thigh, though his legs were still hidden under the covers for now.]

... it happened a long time ago.

[He leans into his brother's hand.]

Does it hurt?

[He looks up and sucks in a breath as he sees the purple on Takatora's cheek. He reaches up to stroke his brother's cheek gently, trying to ease the pain a little bit. He didn't mean to hurt him...]

[... Well, he did at the time, but now the sight of it makes his stomach twist with guilt.]

It... ... yes.

[There really is no good way to put that. It hurts when he takes a shower and the water hits it at the right angle, hurts when he puts too much pressure on it, and when he rolls his shoulders to stretch, he can always feel the scar pulling at his skin. Honestly, sometimes, he thinks it hurts for no good reason, but all of that might just be his imagination.

Takatora makes a soft, alarmed noise at the touch to his cheek, watching Mitsuzane's face with a curious expression. He can't be sure exactly what his brother is thinking.]

[He pulls his hand back and kisses it before brushing his fingers over the skin, smiling slightly. He wants to help it feel better... it's his own fault. He scoots a little closer, nuzzling his cheek against Takatora's fingers. His smile falters a little, as the fear from his nightmares tries to grip him again, and his eyes water. His voice is tight when he speaks.]

I won't let you get hurt again.

[The 'kiss' makes Takatora's eyes widen, his face flushing a bit at the contact. It's... something he would have expected from his younger brother ten years ago, but certainly not now. And the nuzzle to his hand has a small smile tugging at his lips, though it doesn't fully develop by the time Mitsuzane seems to start worrying.

Takatora frowns again, nudging Mitsuzane's face towards his own and fighting the urge to kiss him again in an attempt to be comforting. He mentally smacks himself for thinking of such a thing.]

We'll look out for each other, then. Just be careful.

I'll be careful as long as you are.

[Which probably won't be long, given how much Takatora seems to be stressing himself with work. He closes the gap, pressing his forehead to Takatora's gently, taking a deep breath.]

... I had nightmares.

[It's stupid to let them get to him, but he can't help it. He slides a little closer to Takatora, putting an arm around his torso. He needs touch, he needs some comfort, some reassurance that things are going to be okay.]

[The close proximity makes Takatora suck in a breath, fighting the urge to put space between them. No... Mitsuzane needs him right now, he can't risk pushing him away. The feeling of Mitsuzane's hands on his bare skin doesn't help matters either, but he does his best to force himself to focus on the other's needs. He lowers his hand, gently wrapping his arms around his brother to pull him close and tightly embrace him.]

Would you like to tell me about them?

... You were falling into a pit surrounded by grass in a forest. Someone had pushed you, but I couldn't get there in time. It was... dark. And then it shifted to being in the ocean, and you were drowning... and I couldn't pull you out. I wasn't strong enough. And finally you floated up onto the beach and I tried to help you breathe but... you couldn't.

Someone pulled me off of you but I kept trying to break free and finally they let me go and I just...

[He turns his face away, looking down. It hurt. It hurt so badly, to know that he was there but wasn't strong enough or fast enough to save his brother.]

[Takatora shivers at that. Any time he'd had nightmares (and he'd had a lot), he usually couldn't remember anything upon waking up other than a heavy sense of dread and his body's insistence on keeping his heart rate up for an hour or so. He moves one hand to stroke his brother's hair, comforting him much like he had when Mitsuzane'd had nightmares when he was younger. It's... nostalgic, but a bit painful to be doing it again. He'd always hoped he could protect his brother from everything, but he knows he can't protect Mitsuzane from himself.]

I'm here. ... You can stay with me tonight. I have no objections to that.

... Thank you, nii-san.

[He curls up a bit, pressing his cheek against his brother's chest. He can feel his brother's heartbeat, feel his breath... it's comforting. He's here and he's safe and he's never going to get hurt again.]

It's... it's a little stupid to be so worried about a dream, but... it's not something I can control...

It feels real when it's happening. ... I've had my share of nightmares, I can't think less of you for being bothered by them.

[Some of them have been bad enough to leave him shaken for days, even if he can't remember them. At that point, he's sure it's for the best that he can't.]

[He nods and presses a gentle kiss to Takatora's chest, closing his eyes.]

It just feels foolish. There are so many other things to worry about...

[Whoops. Takatora's face is flushing again and... his body's reaction is entirely unwelcome at this point.]

It can't be helped. You can't control them.

[He continues stroking Mitsuzane's hair, watching him carefully.]

Would you like to talk about something else?

... Sure. Like what?

[He's... not really sure what Takatora's interests are anymore. It's been a while since they both just... tried to relax. He mostly listens to Takatora talk about work, and that's... kind of it.]

[. . .]

I'm...

[What does he talk about? How long had it been since they'd talked like this? Takatora's trying to think of anything to bring up, but really all he can focus on is work or school... Has he really become so boring?]

... I'm not sure.

[He laughs a little bit, trying to dispel the nervous energy he's feeling.]

Both of us don't do much outside of work or school, do we?

[Well... yes, they do. But at least the way it's phrased makes it sound rhetorical.]

I guess I can't ask you if you've read any interesting books lately. Or if you're looking forward to any movies...

Not very much...

[Well, at least Takatora doesn't. He huffs softly and then lowers his head to rest it on Mitsuzane's shoulder. ... which suddenly strikes him as a horrible idea considering his mouth is now closer to exposed skin and he can feel the heat of the other's body through the fabric of his shirt.]

It's been a very long time since I've read anything. ... or watched anything either, I suppose. Mm...

[Is he really that boring?]

The only interesting thing I seem to do anymore is have dinner with my colleagues.

[That... feels really nice. He leans into Takatora a little bit, closing his eyes. The feeling of warm breath on his neck is... well, it shuts him up for a moment as he lowers his hand to fist in the sheets.]

Ah... w... well. That's a shame. We should... do something fun if you get a break... What kind of movie would you want to watch, if you had the chance?

If you're interested in hearing about my coworkers' marriage problems, affairs, or general life events, I suppose those could be amusing...

[Takatora keeps his arms around Mitsuzane's waist, moving his head to lightly brush his lips against the other's collar, though still keeping to the fabric of Mitsuzane's shirt. It's... a very slight, careful action, which Takatora tries to ignore. He shouldn't have done that, either...]

I'm not sure I know what entertains me anymore.

They don't really concern me. You do.

[Oh. He struggles to get words out, just leaning into the kiss, rocking a bit. Should he respond? How should he respond? He lets out a small sigh, trying to think, but it's.. hard. Takatora is extremely distracting.]

Mm... comedy? Drama? Lots of explosions?

[Takatora actually manages a small laugh against Mitsuzane's skin. That movement certainly hadn't gone unnoticed, though Takatora's avoiding mentioning it. Still, his fingers dig in a bit more at Mitsuzane's skin. It's hard to tell if Takatora's being desperate or possessive. ... or both.]

I feel my life has enough drama. ... though light-hearted has never been my style, either.

I -

[He's distracted by Takatora's movements, and he shifts a little more, reaching to draw his fingers down his brother's back gently, fingers brushing the bare skin.]

True... you're so difficult to pick for, nii-san~.

[It takes far too much effort to cut off the soft noise that escapes him. His self-control is all but shattered at this point, thanks to his exhaustion and the (finally) waning effects of alcohol. He buries his face against Mitsuzane's shoulder to muffle himself. Oh, how long had it been since someone had touched him like this?

With what little control Takatora has remaining, he reluctantly, painfully sits back up and carefully begins to put a small amount of space between them.]

I wouldn't mind horror movies or drama, if my life was a little less eventful.

Mm. I see.

[He pouts slightly, and looks down a little bit. Is he really so afraid?]

Nii-san... what are you afraid of? I'm not going to hurt you... I promise. Okay?

[Whoops.]

That's not it.

[Note, there is no I'm not afraid of you, because... well, after Mitsuzane's outburst, Takatora can't help but be a little frightened of him. To have Mitsuzane lashing out like their father... it had brought up a lot of unpleasant memories.]

I'm ...

[giving you space? Takatora's fumbling for words again, unsure what he should say that doesn't come out sounding horrible. ]

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