my heart was limping and this is the end of the road //

[heavenlydecree]

[Despite existing in some form or another for twenty-four years, Takatora still couldn't be sure if he was thankful or not for his ability to function so much like a human. With every new body, his appearance and functions improved significantly. In the beginning, he could remember, his expressions had always been stoic, his voice monotone and unemotional, his body stiff and unforgiving. But, as Yggdrasill's technology improved over the years, so did his bodies.

Now, it was near impossible to tell him apart from a human other than carefully hidden ports on his body, all with various levels of power over each other to avoid crashing completely in the event of an accident destroying one or more. His skin was warm to the touch, his emotions more strongly developed (in part from monitoring his 'brother' so closely for so many years), and he could even eat and process food, though tasting was a bit shaky. It was one of the things that wasn't quite as important, though it was one of the many pieces currently standing by for his next body, if only because Takatora had expressed curiosity.

Today was one of the few days of the week he didn't have to work. Takatora had already reported in to his 'father' the night before with updates about the company and how everything was going. It never felt strange to be so subservient to the man, especially when Takatora had known his role for a very long time. It was simply another one of his duties.

Straightening the collar of his shirt, Takatora rolled his neck, stretching his body a bit before reaching back to self-consciously fluff his hair back down over one of his ports. It was hidden well enough that even someone touching his head wouldn't be able to tell it was there unless they knew, but he was always keenly aware of its presence.

It had taken only a few minutes to be satisfied with his appearance, at which point Takatora left his room and carefully walked down the hall, knocking on Mitsuzane's door. Even though they had known each other for so long, Takatora was always skittish about their interactions. He was fairly sure Mitsuzane had forgotten any times he'd come close to finding out the truth about his 'brother', but Takatora had always been concerned about the consequences. The last thing he wanted was for Mitsuzane to be frightened of him, or worse, disgusted by him.]

... Mitsuzane?

Comments

[heavenlydecree]

I see. You're very noble.

[Takatora made a mildly amused noise at that, nudging the side of Mitsuzane's head with his nose.]

I never knew you looked up to me so much.

[grapeeater]

Well... you're my older brother. Of course I look up to you.

[He smiled a bit and shifted a little closer.]

[heavenlydecree]

[Takatora hesitated before resting his chin on Mitsuzane's head, pulling him in and keeping an arm wrapped around him.]

Mitsuzane...

[How was he even supposed to bring up this topic?]

Tell me what else you remember about the accident.

[grapeeater]

... I don't know how well my mind was working. I know you were hurt but it was like... something tore in your skin. There was... something under there. I know you have... certain spots you don't like to be touched... it...

[Saying it out loud made it seem silly and childish, and even stupid.]

[heavenlydecree]

[... really, what was the use in hiding it, anymore? It would be a betrayal of Mitsuzane's trust to keep him in the dark for much longer, especially with what was happening. Mitsuzane was a very intelligent young man and Takatora had no doubt that he would figure things out on his own eventually. Even now, there was so much evidence, coupled with whatever Mitsuzane might have noticed earlier in life.]

I don't wish to lie to you, Mitsuzane...

[grapeeater]

... I know. But I've never really wanted to ask. I was always afraid that you might not want to talk about it. And I care about you a lot. I don't want to make you uncomfortable.

[heavenlydecree]

I had a feeling you were smart enough to know I was different. You've always been very intelligent.

[Takatora took a deep, sighing breath, nearly hiding his face in Mitsuzane's hair. Would he hate him for this?]

I... am not human.

[grapeeater]

[He just tilted his head up to look at Takatora. He didn't say anything, just waited for him to go on.]

[heavenlydecree]

[Takatora hesitated again, reaching over with his free hand to hold one of Mitsuzane's in his own. Perhaps it was a selfish gesture, hoping to keep his brother closer to him. If he was close enough, it might discourage Mitsuzane from pushing him away.]

Father created me, a long time before you were born. Our parents never anticipated having a child and he wanted the security of having an heir. Rather than adopting, he... created me as a prototype. I've gone through many developments over the course of my existence. ... I've learned many things from you as well.

[grapeeater]

... I see. That explains some things...

[His voice was quiet, and he closed his eyes, leaning against him. He was soft and warm and everything about him was just... his brother.]

... But it doesn't really matter. You're still my brother. I don't care if you're human or not.

[heavenlydecree]

Once you were born, it became my duty to protect you. That I failed in such a way... is unacceptable. However, I know there was nothing more I could have done. I can't justifiably blame myself for what happened.

[The words caught him by surprise. He hadn't expected such an... accepting answer.]

You really are too kind, Mitsuzane.

[Takatora continued petting Mitsuzane's hair, wary of continuing.]

I'm going to bring you back...

[grapeeater]

You did what you could. It's not something you could have predicted.

[He tilted his head into the touch, closing his eyes.]

But... how?

[heavenlydecree]

We've already begun the procedure. That's how I'm speaking to you now. You're in... a form of stasis. You already understand what happened to your body.

[Thankfully, he didn't have to explain that his brother was dead.]

You'll be given a temporary body until we can make you something better. Ideally, you wouldn't be able to tell much of a difference.

[His words were muttered against Mitsuzane's head, still cautious of the potential outburst.]

[grapeeater]

... I see.

[He stiffened a little bit as he tried to take it in.]

... As long as you're with me, I don't mind. I know we'll get through this.

[heavenlydecree]

[That... had gone considerably better than he had imagined. He tightly hugged Mitsuzane against his side, relief flooding through him that he'd made the correct decision.]

I'm sorry. There was not very much time to decide and I... could not imagine being without you, or allowing you to have such a short life. ... I hope that you forgive me.

[grapeeater]

You did what you could. It's okay.

[The The library near the edges faded out and the two of them now were curled up on a couch on a beach, overlooking the sea. A warm breeze blew, and the sun was setting.]

[heavenlydecree]

[The scene fascinated him, just as most things that had to do with Mitsuzane did. He had yet to pull away, still tightly, desperately holding Mitsuzane against him.]

I wonder, perhaps, if someone like me is capable of these things...

[grapeeater]

What do you mean?

[He looked up at the birds flying out towards the sun, cawing as they went.]

[heavenlydecree]

To have a world like this inside of me.

[Takatora makes a thoughtful noise, focused on nothing more than the sound of the water and the feeling of his brother in his arms.]

During the accident... I shut off everything I found unnecessary, to ensure my body could continue running. Even during that time, I felt... ... emotions. Even though I shouldn't have.

[grapeeater]

... You're Takatora. You're not just a machine. You're my brother. If there really is something inside of humans like a soul... I don't see any reason why you wouldn't have one, too. You have an identity. A consciousness. Whatever that is... I don't think humans have a monopoly on it.

[heavenlydecree]

[Mitsuzane's words made him smile. Of course, his adorable, innocent little brother wouldn't be bothered by such things. It made him wonder how he had been so afraid in the beginning. Everything... really was going so much better than expected, despite the circumstances.]

I have never spent much time thinking about it, but I hope you can help me continue to discover more about myself.

[grapeeater]

... We'll help each other. That's what family is for, right?

[heavenlydecree]

Yes. You're correct.

[Takatora pulled back only a little, then, playing with Mitsuzane's hair once again.]

For now, I'm going to stay with you as long as I can. Once I leave, you'll be placed in a temporary body, but I'll be waiting for you.

[grapeeater]

Okay. ... I'm not sure if I can be tired without a body, but I feel tired. I think I might...

[A small note popped up in Takatora's vision, unseen by Mitsuzane.]

He's falling asleep. I'm going to pull you out of the virtual environment in a few minutes. Your father's plane just landed.

[heavenlydecree]

[There was that sinking feeling again. How was he ever going to explain this to their father? But... Takatora knew he had done everything he could. Hopefully that would be enough.

Takatora stroked Mitsuzane's hair once more, pressing a firm kiss to his temple.]

Sleep for now. We'll be together again soon.