heavenlydecree | (no subject)

[If there was one thing Takatora was sure he should have learned by now, it would be how to keep his life in perfect running order. He had been the head of Yggdrasill's Research and Development branch from the moment he'd left high school and even before that, his father had kept him on a tight and strict schedule, never a second unaccounted for or left out of place. Unfortunately, with all of Takatora's scheduling and trying to squeeze an extra hour into every day, he still felt as though he never had time for anything, let alone everything. Even his weekends left little time for himself, though Takatora was also painfully aware of his obsession with triple-checking everything under his command and bringing such weight onto himself. He couldn't allow for errors.

His morning routine started a bit later on the weekends, if only because Takatora knew he had to catch up on sleep at some point to make up for running himself ragged. Getting sick was something he couldn't risk. The usual morning routine went by quickly: dragging himself out of bed (he'd never become a morning person, as much as he wanted to), showering, getting dressed, checking for any news or alerts while he had been sleeping. Thankfully, nothing important had happened during the night. Takatora always lived with the fear of something awful happening while he was asleep that he would be unprepared for, but every morning brought the same temporary relief. For now.

Takatora headed out of his room after an hour or so, still checking his phone as he made his way down the hall and towards the stairs. Ryouma already wanted to talk to him about something, which was mildly surprising as Ryouma rarely (never) got out of bed so early, which meant he'd been up all night again. Stepping past one of the maids, Takatora spoke a return greeting to her as he continued on, paying more attention to typing out messages than his surroundings.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

... who knows.

[Takatora's distance is obviously felt as he carefully sips his drink, though he's at least managing to make eye contact with his younger brother for now.]

[It's hard not to look away, even though he's not sure what he's done at this point. He nods, waiting for his brother to finish.]

If you get a better idea of which it will be, I'd appreciate you letting me know, should you find the time.

[Maybe he should just... go. But he has plenty of time before school... and he doesn't want to let this opportunity get away. Ripping into him about not responding isn't a smart idea at all, and trying to ask for explanations will just get him more silence.]

If you can't and it gets late, I'll have something left for you.

[He doesn't want to try to act like a parent, but he does worry about Takatora skipping meals. It's hard enough sometimes to remember to eat, himself.]

[It somehow felt as though their roles were reversed now, with Mitsuzane being the one to take responsibility for him. Takatora sets his glass on the counter, stretching his right shoulder down a bit when he starts to feel the pull from not moving it.]

I have a lot of work to catch up on, but I should be home at some point tonight.

All right. I'll be home by then.

[Hopefully once he's gotten some work done Takatora will be a little more amicable. Possibly not, but he can at least hope.]

- If you have time this weekend, maybe we can do something together.

[A movie, dinner... something. Even if weekends tend to be the busiest for Beat Riders... he'll make time.]

[That... was not something Takatora expected to hear, as evidenced by the look on his face. He stares at Mitsuzane for a moment and then lowers his gaze, looking surprisingly uncomfortable for once. The jealousy is pulling at him again and as usual, it's easier to try to push people away than pull them in.]

Why?

[A part of him, somewhere in the back of his mind, celebrates the fact that he scored a hit somehow. The rest of him is just relieved that the answer wasn't automatically a 'no'.]

... Because you're my brother? Because I like spending time with you? Because we both need to relax, if only for an hour or two? There are a lot of reasons of reasons.

Don't you have practice on the weekends? Or at least performances.

[He really has no idea what Mitsuzane's schedule is, but he assumes that's how dance teams work. The weekend would be when everyone was out of school and would be free to watch.]

You never enjoyed spending time with me before. I'm sure being with your friends is much more relaxing than spending time with me.

[Wow, yes. That jealousy is very obvious now.]

[He just... sighs. Is that what he really thinks? ... He's right these days, even if he still hides part of himself around them.]

... I do, but I'm happy to make time for you. Just because I have friends doesn't mean I stop having a brother. Is... that what you think this is about?

[Oh. Why didn't he see that before?]

They're an addition, not a replacement.

[Takatora's painfully aware now of how obvious he was being, clearly a bit more shaken now as he pushes himself away from the counter. The cool act was something he had always tried to pull off, but it only worked for so long until he was called out on someone who knew his true feelings (usually by Ryouma.) Takatora keeps his gaze lowered, trying not to draw attention to his current state.]

It's not important.

If it's bothering you, it's important to me, because I care about you.

[Seeing him this way... is this what happened to him as he got older and less clingy? Does he miss those days? It's... hard to tell for sure, but it's a good guess.]

I want you to be happy, nii-san. And if there's something I can do to make you happier, I want to know.

[At this point, Takatora's a bit confused over what to think. Of course, Mitsuzane keeps saying he cares about him, but... ... has he been overreacting? Maybe Mitsuzane really meant it, but Takatora was sure he would be feeling differently if the words were true.]

The things that would make me happy are too difficult to achieve and too selfish to ask for. I would rather you not concern yourself with them.

At least let me try.

[Is he pleading? Maybe he is. At this point he doesn't even care anymore.]

[Takatora steps further away from the counter, crossing the room in a few paces and suddenly far too close inside Mitsuzane's personal space. He gently grasps the other's chin in his hand, tilting Mitsuzane's head up to look at him intently, though he says nothing for a few moments.]

Part of me wishes you didn't care.

[He meets his brother's gaze as strongly as he can, but being touched makes his brain stop for a moment. He fights the urge to swallow nervously, and tries to keep his voice steady.]

Why? You're my brother. And as much as you want to keep me safe, I want to keep you safe, too. That includes keeping your happiness safe.

[... oh, no. This was a horrible idea. Takatora can feel his self-control slipping as it always does when Mitsuzane is kind to him, but it's made far worse by being so close to him. It's especially bad with how lost he's felt the last few days. He tightens his hold a bit, setting his jaw in an attempt to hold himself back.]

... please don't say those things to me.

[He tries not to move too much. He's not totally sure what's going on. At least the pressure on his chin doesn't hurt, but it will if Takatora presses much more.]

... Why?

[Takatora hesitates for a moment, removing his hand from Mitsuzane's chin to begin sliding his touch up the other's jaw. It takes a moment for him to realize what he's doing, which causes him to quickly draw his touch back as he always seems to do.]

Enjoy your practice, Mitsuzane.

[Dropping that topic fast and hard, Takatora's also stepping aside to start walking out of the room.]

[That... he has an idea of what that meant, though he's not sure if he wants to think about it right now. It takes his brain a few extra seconds to start working again, by which time Takatora is already heading out of the room.]

... Have a good day, nii-san.

[Just as if nothing had happened. ... Should he go to practice today? ... No. He said he'd come home and he means to stick to his promise. He has to finish getting ready for school. He waits until Takatora is gone before starting to make his breakfast.]