heavenlydecree | the moon is rising on this dangerous night //

the moon is rising on this dangerous night //

[Takatora had, as usual, buried himself in work all day. He'd even stayed out far later than usual due to a few back-to-back business meetings, though he'd been kind enough to spare a few moments to let Mitsuzane know. He didn't want his younger brother to worry about where he was or why he wasn't home on time. Unfortunately, he was a bit vague with saying "probably around midnight". It had been one of those nights, meetings followed by outings and social drinking. Takatora had honestly never cared for it, but it was something he did because it made business partners happy. People talked a lot more when they had alcohol in their system as well, but Takatora had been careful to be polite in his acceptance of drinks while still going slow enough to maintain his composure. There was always the sinking concern that someone would manipulate information out of him while he was vulnerable. He couldn't allow that to happen.

By the time he returns home, it's closer to twelve-thirty. His clothing and everything about him smells of smoke and alcohol. It makes him a bit self-conscious, knowing it's completely out of character for him. He'd even, on one of his rare instances, accepted a cigarette from a colleague. It was a strange and nostalgic happening, but Takatora had thoroughly washed his mouth out afterwards. Still, the smell of smoke from that and the bar itself clung to him.

Takatora rubs at the back of his neck as he walks through the home, anxious to change out of his clothes. However, in passing Mitsuzane's door, he hesitates and then doubles back. It would be best to check on him in case he'd waited up. So he knocks, careful and light.]

Mitsuzane?

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[Takatora's expression falters a bit at the hold and he visibly tenses up, but otherwise tries not to react. He helps his brother drink, pausing occasionally to let the other swallow and catch his breath. When Mitsuzane is done, he pulls the glass away and sets it down on the nightstand. Carefully, he pets his brother's hair, then lowers his hands and moves to nudge him back into bed.]

[He does lie down, though he reaches out to hold on to his brother's arm.]

Nii-san... I love you, nii-san...

[Takatora leans down with him, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of his brother's mouth.]

I love you too, Mitsuzane. More than anything.

Good... stay with me...

[He reaches up to wrap his arms around his brother's shoulders, trying to tug him down.]

Nii-san...

... where else would I go?

[He allows Mitsuzane to pull him down, leaning over the other with one hand on either side of him.]

[He reaches up to stroke his brother's cheek, and then tries to guide him down to pull him into a kiss.]

I love you...

[How can he even express it? He lets out a little gasp, and tries to push up against his brother.]

[Takatora allows the kiss, making an amused noise at the repeated confessions coming from his brother's mouth. ... really, Mitsuzane. He returns the kiss, gentle and chaste, though the movement instantly brings a flush to his face.]

-- Mitsuzane, no. Not right now.

But...

[His voice pitches up - why not? Why can't he express it? He needs to. His brother has to know just how much he wants to be with him.]

Nii-san, please... please...

[It's begging, but he needs it. He needs to be close to know that there's one person he can always count on, that he can express his love to.]

I just... I just want to...

... I don't want to take advantage of you.

[But that pleading is making it very hard to resist. It's always been difficult to stand his ground when Mitsuzane wants something. ... He gives in a little, adjusting his position to grab his brother's waist and hold him there, running his fingers over the bare skin. ... no, he really should stop.]

Later. When you're better.

I'm fine...

[Oh, he's more than that. The feeling of his brother's skin against his own feels wonderful, and he lets out a low moan, pressing up against it.]

... You promise later? I... I really want you to... to touch me... to hold me... I want to feel you against me, nii-san... I want to feel you in me...

Edited 2015-03-22 03:32 (UTC)

[... and that's the sound of Takatora's self-control slipping again. Before he can stop himself, his face is flushed and his body is responding in ways he doesn't appreciate, both at the sight of his brother writhing like that and seemingly everything that leaves his mouth.]

Mitsuzane...

[Maybe these friends really were a bad influence...]

Mm? Is it... so bad to want to be close to someone you love?

[He tugs at him again, trying to pull him down against him.]

I didn't hear that promise...

It's a little fast.

[He's... a little terrified that Mitsuzane will regret what they're doing. Or hate him later. He's supposed to be the responsible one, after all. He frowns, then rolls back onto the bed and lays down next to his brother.]

I won't promise anything.

... But I want to. And you want to, right? Unless you don't want me anymore...

[He closes his eyes and curls up a bit, turning away.]

... Mitsuzane, you know that's not true.

[He grabs at his brother and tries to turn him around again.]

I love you very much. Nothing you could do would change my feelings for you.

[He grabs for his brother' hand, though his coordination is somewhat off.]

I just... I just want you to love me, and I know you love me like that too... and I just thought... that's what you would want. I want to be close to you and I want to touch you and... you're really hot, nii-san. It's hard to control myself around you...

[... well, so much for keeping his face anything other than a shade of red. The compliment isn't helping his situation and he stares at Mitsuzane for a moment. It's... not as though he doesn't believe him, but to hear that his brother actually finds him attractive? ... it's a little overwhelming to hear.

When Mitsuzane reaches for his hand and misses, Takatora grabs for Mitsuzane's instead.]

What I want is to be close to you. I want to protect you, keep you safe, and make you believe above all else how much you mean to me. Whatever it takes to convince you of that... I'll consider.

[He squeezes his brother's hand, stroking the skin with his thumb.]

I want to help nii-san, too. I want to protect him and keep him safe... and no matter what tries to hurt you, I'll help you fight it. You're my brother... I want you to feel good, not terrible. I want to make you smile, not cry... I know you've been... doing work with dangerous things...

[He looks at his brother's shoulder pointedly, before looking back at him.]

... So nii-san can tell me whatever he needs in order to let me help him...

[... sigh. Takatora leans in and presses a kiss to Mitsuzane's forehead, staying close to him. All of that, he'd rather not have his brother worrying about.]

I'll be fine, Mitsuzane.

[He sits up a bit, brow furrowed.]

No. Things are getting really dangerous out there... and I don't know what I would do if something happened to you. So you need to promise that you'll let me protect you. Let me be your armor, nii-san. Let me help you.

[Are they really going to argue about this? He wants to defuse the situation, but to refuse his brother ... well, Mitsuzane is very stubborn.]

It's my responsibility to look out for you. Lie back down.

That doesn't mean I can't look out for you, too! Unless you think I'm not capable of doing that... which I am. You know I am...

[Takatora frowns at the escalating situation, reaching out to nudge Mitsuzane to lie back down, since he's not listening.]

I understand that. I know how strong you are. I know how capable you are. I simply don't want you involved. It's not a reflection on your abilities, it's... .... a selfish desire of mine, because I want to keep you safe.

[He very nearly slaps his brother's hand away, but doesn't. As it is he just stays as still as he can, though he's practically vibrating from anger.]

And you don't think I don't want you safe, too? Let me take a little bit of your burden, so that I can make it easier for you.

I understand what you want, Mitsuzane.

[This was the same thing they'd argued about last night, wasn't it? The mark on his face aches at the memory.]

I... don't know where to begin, with that sort of thing. I've done everything on my own until now. To share with someone else seems impossible.

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